Category Archives: Intention

Grit True or Grit False?

Getting Grit

Angela Duckworth – Grit

In my teens, I began feeling, as many people that age do, a serious lack of … something. Something I didn’t have but which I believed would enable me to live without the constant sense of malaise that gnawed away deep in my inner space. Within me was a strong sense of “I can’t do it”, whatever “it” might turn out to be, and furthermore, I probably wouldn’t ever be able to do it.

Showing Is Better than Telling

Doubters Dragging You Down?

A question I frequently receive concerns being surrounded by negative friends, family members or co-workers and how discouraging they can be. A few days ago, I received another such email:

“My husband just doesn’t get it – I try to explain the laws of attraction, but he always rejects the idea, and sometimes ridicules me for my gullibility. How can I get him to stop being so negative and see how important this is? I tried to get him to watch the movie ‘The Secret’ with me, but he just made fun of it and walked out. Is it possible to get results while I’m surrounded by all this negativity?”

Rebuilding Your Beliefs

Hand-Me-Down Ideas

Most of our beliefs are second-hand goods. We acquire the bulk of them, beginning at a very early age, from those around us, and then we spend much of the rest of our lives trying both to cling to them and shake ourselves loose from them.

We take our beliefs on so lightly, so full of trust, thinking they are fundamental truths, but eventually we begin suspecting that many of them are a bad fit. That’s when we find that bringing a belief in is a lot easier than inviting it out. What a strange comedy.

Retiring Your Fears

fear view mirrorI remember reading somewhere, Words, said with certainty, can alter our beliefs.”

I really like that. Getting a client to put their own words together with their own actions is a great way to teach them DIY confidence.

About that thing I do, it’s similar to the way a hypnotist will place your pain in a blind spot, except

The Impatience of Mrs. Suzuki

Patience is a virtue … everybody agrees, right?

Back in the 14th century, British poet William Langland was probably the first to introduce this thought into English. And the ensuing seven hundred years have done nothing to disprove it. Just the opposite.

So why are so many people still so impatient?

Who’s That Knockin’ on Your Door?

Missing Messages

Imagine this: You’re at a friend’s house, cheerfully chatting, and there’s a knock at the front door. But your friend makes no move to go see who it is. The knocking continues, gradually becoming more insistent, but still your friend ignores it.

Finally, you offer, “Don’t you think you should go see about that?”

Grampa’s Business Rules

The Rules for Success Are Not New

You know, business doesn’t have to be a complex, Harvard-B-school kind of thing, all complicated and hard for ordinary mortals to understand. Much of it CAN be boiled down to some pretty simple stuff.

My paternal grandfather didn’t have a degree in business. In fact, he never got past the third or fourth grade, but that didn’t stop him from running several successful businesses and owning a significant part of the small north-Georgia town where he lived.

Taking Permanent Control of Your Moods

Your Mental State Is in Your Hands

I sure do hope you’re not typical … because the typical person has little control over how they’ll feel when they get up tomorrow.

Most days, they feel like a pinball. They crawl out of bed expecting that — again today — they’re going to be bounced from one obstacle to another, pushed this way and that, and rolled helplessly into an unending stream of unexpected experiences.

Getting Your Confidence Back

When Confidence Deserts You

How many different ways have you heard it said?

  • “I can’t get my golf swing (free throw; tennis serve; pitching) back on track”
  • “All these hours of practice are only making things worse”
  • “I wonder why I ever thought I could be an athlete”
  • “Others might succeed, but I guess I’ll never make it.”

Ever been there?

I have. And so have most people … if they’ll tell you the truth.

The Most Unpopular Secret of Personal Power

HELEN KELLER SAID, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

So you hate the hard times you’ve passed through? Maybe you need to think again.

Easy times never stretch us, never enlarge our strengths, never give us a new, expanded grasp of our capabilities.

Your Affirmations vs. Your Results

Getting What You Expect out of Life?

If not, how do you behave when you’re disappointed?

My wife and I last year moved back to Japan after living six years in Thailand. Now, I’ve eaten and enjoyed Thai food for years, but being in the source-country of all that goodness did bring me a few surprises. Take milk for example.

A Better Neighborhood

Protection or Prevention?

Let’s talk about this idea of projecting a circle or a sphere of protection around ourselves to keep ourselves safe.

Most spiritual instructors teach that we absolutely need some kind of protection to keep us from being dangerously exposed and helpless. And in many ways they’re absolutely right. The everyday world we live in actually is teeming with hazards and negative influences, and under those circumstances, it only makes sense to wrap ourselves in a glowing aura of positivity.

Balking at Self-Change

Still Fighting the Changes You Really Want?

Most of us want things to be better in our lives. But then, when the opportunity for change comes, we may fight against the very things we say we want.

My friend Joanne had decided to have a large storage shed built in her back yard. She had even hired the contractor and paid him a sizeable deposit. The problem started when he asked where, exactly, did she want it located.

Determined to Be Unhappy

Happiness Is an Inside Job

Abraham Lincoln, a man well acquainted with the disappointments and sorrows of life, once said: “Folks are about as happy as they make their minds up to be.”

What he meant was, if you are truly determined to be happy, it’s well within your power to make it happen … regardless of what the people around you are doing to you, saying against you, thinking about you, or withholding from you. In other words, your mental state is your own doing.

As a corollary to that, your UNhappiness is also your own doing.

Obedience Training?

Will Your Child Be Somebody’s Servant? Are You?

Mike said his dad looked ready to spit poison. One of the ladies at church had just commented, “Teddy, your little boy is so polite.” As always, Mike’s father loved to hear that. He beamed, “Yep, I’m raising my boy to be a good, obedient kid.”

But that particular day, old Mr. Corley happened to be walking past. Mr. Corley … the old man who owned half the town. The old man who never dressed fancy, never lived high, and never said much to anybody, and who certainly never poked his nose into anybody else’s affairs. That Mr. Corley.

But this time, old man Corley butted in. He growled, “Aw hell, Teddy, you ain’t raising a kid. You’re just training somebody’s servant for ‘em.”

Everything ALWAYS Works Right

Failing Takes a Lot of Effort

“Son,” my Dad would say, “You could screw up a one-man funeral.” I don’t know how many thousands of times my father told me that while I was growing up, but it soaked in pretty deeply.

By the time I reached adulthood, I was convinced; nothing would ever work right for me; if there was a way to mess things up, I’d always find it. That was just a fact of my existence: I was a screwup.

How Money Became a Sin

Why Do They Say Those Awful Things About Money?

Been hearing it all my life — “The love of money is the root of all evil”.

It’s in the holy scriptures, right? Of course, many teachers and gurus make a big deal of this, explaining the distinction that “It’s not money that’s evil, it’s the LOVE of money.”

Well, here’s the thing. Long before there was money (OR the love of money), evil reared its ugly head when the Angel Lucifer led a rebellion in heaven. (At least, that’s the Judeo-Christian version of the story.)

How to Become a Ten

High Achievers Do it Differently

Pick any office. Go in, watch the workers for a while, and track how much gets done by each individual.

A few will never seem to get around to anything, unless forced to. Most of the employees will do what’s placed in front of them, and not much more. But a select few will quickly get their job done, do it superbly, then jump to do more. They’re the self starters.

The Trick to Riches

Causing Wealth to Happen to You

When you daydream about being vastly rich, how do you see that money coming to you? Is it just mysteriously there, right in your hand, ready to spend and spend and spend? Or maybe the only way you can imagine getting riches is by winning the lottery?

More than 8,000 millionaires dot the fiscal map of the United States alone. And 90% of them started out with essentially nothing. They got theirs the old-fashioned way … they earned it all. Of course, many of the industries they rode to riches are not old-fashioned, but that’s a different matter.

The Teacher Appears

Lessons in the Dirt

You’ve heard it hundreds of times – when the student is finally ready, the teacher is going to show up and set things right… maybe lead you triumphantly into the promised land.

But have you ever had a teacher come tapping on your shoulder, ready and eager to reveal to you all the secrets of the ages?

Agenda Item 3: Save the World

Giant-Size Bites

Denny was always choking himself at our school lunch table. You’ve heard of biting off more than you can chew? Not Denny. I never saw him chew.

He’d bite off more than he could swallow. At least twice a day he’d shovel in too much and we’d see him stop, his eyes watering, while he strained to get it all down. In the four years I knew him, Denny never learned to take smaller bites.

Depression Is a Volunteer Activity

De-Mystifying Moods

I was feeling great that day, so naturally I decided to screw it up. Feeling happy was not a common thing for me. In fact, I spent a LOT of time depressed from the age of 15 till I was around 30. After that I mellowed out a bit, and how that happened is a story.

When you can’t seem to control your own moods, you tend to look either for relief or for answers. I opted for answers, and where I looked was in positive thinking books.

Will a Name Stop You?

How Small Is Your Sticking Point?

It was a simple question on a business forum run by a large U.S. bank:

“I am planning an ecommerce website to retail paintball products. I’m looking for a [domain] name, but the one I came up with is already registered. So I’m stuck, which puts me back at the start. I want a memorable but short name, that also gets across the business I’m in. It should be an experiential name as well as a functional/descriptive one.”

Chaos for Fun and Profit

The Upside of Uncertainty

Ever heard of Dan Peña? He’s a quirky and fascinating man, a real life rags-to-riches bootstrap multi-millionaire who taught himself to build net worth by taking over huge corporations and either running them better or selling off the mismatched parts and reinvesting the new cash (which is basically the same thing).

Motivation Is Caring What Happens

Too Cool to Care

We were standing around, heads hanging, listening to the boss berate us for letting quality slide.

In my early twenties, I worked for a few years in a custom color photo lab where we developed film and made prints for professional photographers. When they shot product setups, weddings or formal portraits, they brought us the film for extra careful processing. And we had a good reputation, but lately we hadn’t been living up to our name.